When we returned to our lavish resort, I carefully washed it and let it dry until morning.
The next morning is a sad day for the following two reasons:
1. It was our last few hours on the resort until our flight departed.
And 2. you will find out very soon.
I do not wear my hat that dreary day. No, I decide I will hold onto it instead. It still had dried mud on it and would need a better washing as soon as we arrive home.
"You realize that hat is going to turn brown." The LG is full of smarts. And full of ruining my good mood.
"Stop it. It's green. It's not going to turn brown." I know very well it would dry up and turn an ugly shade of light tan, but I am planning on hanging it on our living room wall. And wearing it for hat day at school. "Anyway, I don't care."
We arrive at the aeropuerto and the LG jets off to use the restroom. He obviously didn't use the bathroom at the hotel like I did. Or maybe he didn't use it because I was in there. Anyways, that's besides the point. The point is that the LG was no where around me when the next scene unravels.
I am standing not quite in the airport, but just on the outerwall of it, near something of a security checkpoint. I am carrying a purse, camera, and have two carryons, one on each side. And in my hands I am holding the things most precious to my heart. My passport and my hat. God, I loved that thing.
"Miss! You can come over here!" yells an airport officer.
"Um, it's okay. I'll wait." I don't have to be rushed. I just spent 4 days un-rushing, and now I'm supposed to rush? Just like that? It's not happening.
"Miss, bring your bags here."
Didn't they see I was not traveling alone? My traveling companion had deserted me for the restroom, but he would be back very very soon.
"No. I'm waiting for someone. He'll be right back."
"No, miss. It's okay, we'll just take your bags." The man begins to walk towards me and makes googly eyes at my beautiful hat. He, too, recognizes good quality.
"You can't take that." He says sternly pointing at my hat.
"What? No, I just bought it. I will put it in my luggage. Or I'll wear it. Whatever."
"NO. You. Cannot. Bring. It. On. The. Plane."
"Don't worry. I will put it in my luggage--"
He SNATCHES the hat out of my hands before I can undermine his authority again. I stand paralyzed in shock. "Noo..." I plead.
"No. HAT."
And at that moment something happened that changed everything.
No longer was this trip so beautiful. Who cares that we were catered to for four lovely days? So what that they made us a bubble bath sprinkled with rose petals in our room for when we returned from our excursion? Unlimited drinks, beautiful weather, massages on the beach...None of this mattered anymore as I...
and this is all true folks...
watch the man step away from me with my hat between his hands. He saunters over to his officer buddies and says something in Spanish that I don't understand and in one quick motion CRUSHES MY HAT BETWEEN HIS HANDS and throws it in the trash can!!!!!
At that lovely moment, the LG comes back.
"Ready, pussy cat?" I don't have the energy to remind him that we're in public.
"THAT man just took my hat!!!"
"WHAT?!!" He's just as shocked as I am.
"I KNOW." Thankfully, I think, the LG is a strong mofo: he can take him. Really. And he's been in lots of fights, but ones I've only heard of...never actually witnessed...I just take his word for it.
Instead the LG's reaction is much more calm than I have ever seen,
"It's okay, kid. It was going to turn brown anyway. Let's go." He grabs our luggage and goes through security.
"But my hat..."
And that's how, in one quick moment, my life of luxe resorts and days of frolicking on the beach quickly became a memory of the past, and I was thrown back into the harsh reality that is our world.
Epilogue: (because every good story has an epilogue)
After boarding the plane, we discover that no plants are allowed on international flights as they might have creepy bugs all over them. And we don't want foreign insects in our country. Hmm...and that hat was on my head, creepy bugs and all. Maybe that's why I'm feeling sick lately??
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